Thor comes crashing into the room asking whether or not our drinking problem is truly helping the war effort against the frost giants.  A dude runs in while tripping balls on bath salts and not only steals Adam’s innocence, but also runs off with our beloved pet goat named after a children’s TV show character.  It isn’t Lance’s fault that the Mexicans working the kitchen at the pizza place ruined their computer by watching porn, but he still has to do his laundry in that rape dungeon of a basement of his apartment.  We can all agree that Star Wars would have been 100x more depressing with Christopher Walken playing Han Solo.Continue reading