Man, neanderthals really had it rough, no kombucha, monkfruint extract, erythritol, APFSDS rounds, or PlayStation Plus? How did they get by?!

Man, neanderthals really had it rough, no kombucha, monkfruint extract, erythritol, APFSDS rounds, or PlayStation Plus? How did they get by?!
I need to write more. Fuck, really. I stopped for way too long and it sucks. I wanted to do a weekly column for a while, but for some reason, I never really started. We are all cooped up now for the forseeable future, so here goes. This is the first of hopefully many.